I should be sewing right now. xD But I apparently found it boring to go on doing running stitches for my sock accessory ribbons. I'll get to it after I finish typing about this little thing and try to start on the ascot for my costume. I'm going to be cosplaying this Saturday (Today is Friday btw. xD) and I'm not quite done with my costume accessories just yet. X_x;
Shy of two months more left before I finally get my most coveted hairstyle from two years back. I've always wanted to get this to finally mark my start into a serious adherence into a particular fashion/subculture that I've always wanted to dive into but never got around to do so. (Money, 'bahala na' (postponement) and family interventions)
The want to have my hair cut has never been stronger till now.
Well the want has always been strong. Heck, even when my hair wasn't long enough yet, I had been whining about it to myself while I washed dishes how I wish my hair was long enough already so I can finally get it for real.
And now... It's somewhat ready, I can't have a hair cut. X_x;
The hair cut in question is called the princess/hime cut. It's the hair style donned by the female nobility back in the Heian period. Since there's just way too many variations of this style, I have yet to really choose what best fits me though I'm gravitating towards a particular one.
At the moment, my hair is waist length already. My asymmetric bangs I've had since February have grown and is now chin length. Not to mention curling inwards. O_o I think it's ready for such a style but I'd like it longer nonetheless... Just to be sure.
I'm a little frightened that it might not fit me after all. Despite it being my holy grail hairstyle up to now... (My ex-holy grail hairstyle used to be that of Lady Une when she was in her 'ambassador' mode XD) I'm not so mindful anymore of what my immediate family thinks since the last time I did that (and dismissed my own feelings, preferring to go with their judgment), I felt miserable and despised myself (and my hair >_>) Funny but it had been one of those 'climactic' moments in my life when I realized that you can't always try to please everyone; putting yourself aside in favor of others isn't always going to be the best thing or will make you happy; and that age does not guarantee wisdom. After I followed their advice, I did not like the results of it. I remember my sister going 'Oops. But it'll grow back' and my mom saying 'It doesn't matter what your opinion is of your appearance since those who look at you know better than you do'.
From then on, I decided that whatever I dress and put upon my person won't be influenced by them anymore. Or at least not as much. I don't want to be HS kid who used to depend on her older sister to dress her up and dictate her to become a fashion victim. Yes, that's true. My sister used to coordinate my clothes a lot before for me because I was just a kid to them anyway. :P I wore socks with sandals because they said it was okay. He he he.
...I still feel bitter when I look back at that event though.
Personally, I believe whatever beautification (or otherwise XD) you do to yourself should be something you really want to do to yourself. Something that'll make you feel good about yourself. There will be oopsies along the way but it can be fixed still. (Somehow... I wasn't too keen on this because I was so busy blaming my sister back then who justified that I liked my hair---though her account of me saying I liked my hair was from a year back when I voluntarily chose to chop off a lot of my hair, waist length at that time mind you. When I told her you're one year late/using a past event to justify the present, she went 'Oh well. I still think you look good.') You should want it too. (Yes, yes... I know it was a mistake to believe my sister upon this matter, to think I really don't trust her as much or respect her tastes since they're so... mainstream for me and then what? Oh crap... Stupid moment >_>;; Major...stupid moment) Although other people's opinions will come up, remember that you can't please everyone. Some people will think negatively of you and even ridicule your choices. It may hurt you because they're true or whatever cause but hey... What's done is done and let's just move on from there. Being affected and overly dependent on the opinions of others, for me, isn't healthy. You become a crowd pleaser and in that way, you'll never be happy.
I've always thought of getting a long black wig -akin to my hair length- so I can chop it off and check how it'll look on me. But thanks to my canvassing for wigs locally, I find that it's too expensive an experiment to try out. XD; Though my grown out bangs are somehow giving a hint of what sort of problems I'll be having and how it might be on my face. Not bad. Makes my face look longer.
With my current 'convenience' cosplay, I can't help but keep remembering my little hair dream since the character I'll be going as... Well her hair is a hime cut after all. ^^;; Only that she's blonde, European and fair skinned. But she has a pink and black hair color option. Considering I'm such a stickler for detail and accuracy, I find that my hair is really inadequate and wrong for this. Other than the fact, I have no idea what her moves are, name wise, and I'm simply doing random movements---and hopefully with force that'll (hopefully) look cool when asked for during the convention. X_x; (Me ranting about that particular cosplay is reserved for yet another entry if I feel the need to do so...) I want to get the hair right... I've been contemplating getting the hair just so I can satisfy my nitpicky nature only to realize that if I did tamper with my hair as it is now, it would compromise a future cosplay plan for December.
=_=; I should have chosen a character for this incoming event that wouldn't leave me in pins and needles because of inaccuracy.
Plan A did not work so I ended up going for Plan B which... turned out to be more of a monster than I expected it to be.
I keep telling myself that it's okay if I don't get the hime cut yet for this convention since this event is known for being lame (for it's four years of existence) and everything else that you don't want to happen at your local convention. : / And from the attendance last year, people going for accuracy was fairly low. So... I try to console myself with that, thinking that it wouldn't be so bad to look not to correct. Or that there have been others who have attempted the very same character and weren't such sticklers for detail and simply wore it anyway.
Not to mention, whenever I look at the mirror, I feel my hair's not long enough for the cut anyway.
Though one day, I will get that ever so coveted hair style.
And be serious about that fashion/subculture I've been wanting to be part of since HS.
Now... I should get back to converting my bias tape into working sock accessory ribbons for my cosplay tomorrow. I'm still not done after all.
Then move on to cutting little alfa gena squares for my 'mock' ascot ribbon. XD
- Music:Charcoal Filter - tight rope